Relationship Reflection

Forming positive relationships is essential to personal and professional growth and success.  Developing a partnership with another requires reciprocity in a respectful and compassionate manner.  Both individuals need to be bought into the relationship and put forth equal effort to maintaining and supporting their relationship with each other.  Usually, a relationship is long-lasting when there is a shared interest or common goal set to accomplish as partners.  If any of these characteristics are missing, the relationship can be one-sided and result in dissatisfaction, and even termination.  Nurturing a partnership is hard work, yet it is rewarding to have meaningful shared experiences with the important ones around you.

When considering the most valued positive relationships I have, three individuals come to mind.  The first is my husband, who has been a part of my life for over fifteen years.  He is my best friend, my number one cheerleader, and is who I count on when things feel most challenging.  I have learned over the years that relationships do indeed require give-and-take in communication and responsibilities to each other.  The most important lesson I have learned throughout our journey together has been how we communicate with each other in a kind way.  Through personal experiences, I have learned that you must respect each other’s support and effort, acknowledge their feelings, and be clear about the messages communicated.  When building a life with one another, communication is top priority to creating a positive relationship.

The second person that is currently a positive influence in my life, is my professional leader and mentor.  I was hired under her leadership ten years ago in a brand-new school, that was literally built from the ground up the year I joined her.  I was freshly graduated from college and eager to learn with her how to grow a successful high-quality early childhood setting.  We both stumbled and made many mistakes learning our new positions throughout the years.  However, we were successful because we supported each other when we fell and backed one another by working together on each challenge we took on.  Over the years, I have learned a great deal about interactions with children and adults from my mentor.  Her passion for supporting others around her through acknowledging feelings and creating partnerships has been inspiring for me to experience professionally and personally.  She has also shown trust in me throughout the years to take chances and make mistakes professionally.  When learning about developing and growing relationships, individuals need models to guide them through experiences.  I feel lucky that I have had such a compassionate and professional model for forming positive relationships in our field.

The third person I have had the joy to form a partnership with is a colleague.  I was given the challenge of becoming a mentor for this teacher within my school the last two years.  She began as a student intern and has worked her way up to a full-time preschool teacher over the past five years.  I have taken what I have learned from my personal and professional relationships in the past to foster our new partnership, and hopefully pass on the importance of developing skills in supporting positive relationships.  One of the biggest challenges I found when mentoring another, was the unexpectedness of our interactions.  I had to practice active listening and acknowledge my own feelings more often that I had anticipated.  As we discussed this week from our readings, I had to become aware of my unconscious biases to be open during our interactions and truly be available to support her.  Additionally, these practices helped me learn things from her in a respectful and reciprocal manner that I may have not known without our partnership.

Each relationship I have experienced in my lifetime has shaped how I interact within partnerships.  Developing a relationship is not an easy task or to be taken lightly.  I have learned that I must have an awareness of my own feelings, as well as others when working together, and be able to clearly communicate to the individuals I am working with.  Early childhood professionals can emotionally and physically stretch themselves further than they should and have unrealistic expectations for the professionals and families they work with.  Sharing the experiences with others, rather than judging them, can deflate stress levels and teach valuable lessons about one another.  From personal experience, open communication and a willingness to share a common goal are the key to success when cultivating a relationship.

The day my husband and I exchanged vows with our family with us.

The day of my senior presentation at the regional early childhood conference.  This was the first time I met my mentor, who I joined professionally less than a year after.

After five years of working together, with the last two years working through the development of a coaching relationship.  We have grown to develop a positive professional relationship, as well as a lasting friendship.