Communication Skills Assessments

            Completing the communication assessments was enlightening and validated my perceptions of myself as an effective communicator professionally and personally.  I chose a colleague and my husband to assess my communication skills, along with my own personal assessment.  I had hoped that my sense of positive self-efficacy was equally perceived by others around me.  Self-efficacy is the result of a positive feeling (self-esteem) about one’s effectiveness with a clear sense of self (self-concept) (O’Hair, Wiemann, Mullin, & Teven, 2015).  Throughout all three surveys, both participants scored my communication characteristics similar to my own assessed scores.  However, within each profile category (Communication Anxiety-Low, Verbal Aggressiveness-Moderate, and Listening Style-People Oriented), there was some variation in the scoring.  

            Interestingly, my colleague scores were most aligned with mine.  Matter of fact, we both scored my communication style the exact score in verbal aggressiveness (score of 64).  I believe that we share similar perceptions of my communication skills because I am more aware of my self-presentation in professional settings.  O’Hair et al (2015), notes that most focus more on self-presentation when the contexts of the setting are evaluative, whether it be formal or informal.  Surprisingly, my husband even commented on this aspect while completing the assessments.  After the first couple questions of the first test he commented, “Well I think this is a bit different for your husband than everyone else.” And his scores reflected that feeling.

            My husband is my best friend and the person I have chosen to share my good and bad days with.  He has experienced my communication in emotionally fragile states that no one else has.  Like I mentioned above, he did agree with the categories I fell into within the communication profiles.  However, his scores were extremes for each category.  My amount of self-disclosure is of the greatest amount and is demonstrated the most in the listening skills assessment completed by my husband.  Individuals self-disclose the most intimate information with the people they feel comfortable and trusted with (O’Hair et al, 2015).  My husband gave me a score of 40, which is the maximum score for the “People-Oriented” category of listening skills.  This is a characteristic we discuss often together because we are opposite in that way.

            We both give each other feedback often about this difference as we move through life together.  He is more of an “Action-Oriented” communicator.  The feedback we share with each other influences each of our senses of self.  O’Hair et al (2015), notes that sensitivity levels to feedback is the most important factor of how self-perceptions are impacted.  I think our differing communication styles complement each other, offering various perspectives of feedback to each other.  Growing as a communicator and developing relationships requires the knowledge of when to be sensitive and when to not be as well.  It has taken time and effort to develop the ability to be flexible in that regard with each other, like all relationships and communication.  Bringing an awareness to my own perception and others of my communication skills has created an opportunity to make adjustments and grow as an effective communicator.

Reference

O'Hair, D., Wiemann, M., Mullin, D. I., & Teven, J. (2015). Real communication (3rd. ed). New York: Bedford/St. Martin's.